I wish this had never happened to me. How many times have I thought that in my life, and especially during these last few months. I wish this had never come to me. I’m sure I am not the only one who has felt this way. Whether it’s a chronic illness, a great loss, or other life events, at one time or another, we all think this.
The other day, I was watching one of my favorite movies, The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring. If you have never watched these movies or read the books, you don’t know what you are missing. They are long movies, but worth the time to watch them. There are so many wonderful moments and narratives. Frodo Baggins, the main character, is set upon a path that he never wanted to travel (sound familiar?).
Feeling discouraged and overwhelmed with the weight of this journey, he has a conversation with his mentor, Gandolf:
Frodo never asked for this path. He never wanted to bear this burden. This challenging and difficult journey was thrust upon him. As I have dealt with problem after problem in my life (arthritis, emergency surgery, the loss of my sister, cancer battles/health issues in the family, and now Parkinson’s), many days I have felt like Frodo. “I wish the ring had never come to me, I wish none of this had happened.”
That is how Frodo put it, and that’s how I felt. God, why me? Why now, I’m only 44? I wish this had never happened. These are some of the conversations I had with God and others, and unfortunately, very few answers and reasons were given. But if you keep watching, the conversation does not stop there.
Gandolf simply reminds him that there is a plan and purpose to our lives, that there is someone there for us, watching us, helping us, and that, more than anything, is an encouraging thought. Psalm 23 reminds us, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear not evil, for you are with me.” I find myself very literally walking this path, but I need not fear, for He is with me.
He also gives one simple reminder, a small piece of advice, “All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.” We do not know how many days we have before us, or what they will be like, but we can decide how we will walk through them, and how we will face this new and challenging journey.
Parkinson’s is the “ring” I have been given to bear. All of us have a ring – what is yours? While we do not often choose the ring we will bear, we can choose how we will bear it. We decide, day by day, what to do with the time we are given. What will you do with this journey and the time you have been given? He is with us, He knows the path and its end, and if we let Him, He will guide and comfort us, and that is an encouraging thought.
Often when I go through trials I am reminded what job said in Job 2:10 "...shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil?..."
ReplyDeleteI often feel my strength fails on the day of adversity but God's grace is sufficient.
Thank you so much.
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